homemade blues

This week I saw a side of G that I don't see very often - disorganized. Yeah. He's a perfectionist. By nature, and by training. So when I see this side of him, it just reminds me that he is himself imperfect. And though I accept him with all his flaws (as he accepts mine), it does annoy me. Sometimes immensely. Like today.

It just started with the plan I made with Liz to get our hair done. (Btw, her hair color is absolutely GORGEOUS. I wish I had the guts (and the skin tone) to do the same.) G decided to get M and T (and A) to join him in a virtual golf game somewhere near where Liz and I were planning to go, and got into this spin-cycle of planning and cancelling, and re-planning, etc... He even decided to bring the boys along. Already we got into a bit of an argument when he "casually" suggested that N comes with me and Liz. Fact was he already discussed with M and then let me know the plan. Which didn't coincide with mine.

I'm not really sure why it pi$$ed me off about N joining us. Maybe 'twas the idea that this thing Liz and I were going to do is "our" thing. But I felt strongly that N may not be comfortable - the salon we went to is a bit pricey, and could make her feel inferior, and I never want to do that to her. She's much too nice. When I tell G about how I felt, he just pished-poshed the whole thing. Like HE knows how a woman's mind works. He already has enough trouble with me.

Maybe N wouldn't mind, I don't know. But I don't even want to put her in that position in the first place. And G doesn't get it. Arrrghh! It just makes me so mad at him.

Anyhoo, that's water under the bridge. After Liz and I were done with our business, we went to BSC, where he and the boys (and the men) were. And when we got there, A was crying and the maid told me he's hungry, and I just went into my silent treatment mode. When we plan something to include the children, their needs come first. And food is one of the basic needs. I just can't tolerate it when this is not taken into consideration. He decided to bring the boys, right? So it's his responsibility.

I was fuming. And also hungry. And of course G picked up the vibe, and got all agitated. And he was also hungry. So everybody was hangry (hungry+angry).

We couldn't decide where to have lunch in BSC, so we ended up leaving BSC and went to McD Bangsar for a very late lunch. A fell asleep in my arms after a handful of fries, and a bottle of milk. Geram betul! But at the end of it, we trashed it out in the car (which is not good really because we had heated verbal exchange in front of D) and worked it out.

Lesson learnt: Don't plan "me" time on weekends. If we do, plan something else for the children. It's not worth the emotional trouble.

Which brings me to correlate what happened today with the title of this blog entry. I'm not sure whether me being home more will trigger more "unhappiness" between G and me. We both have our own ideas how things should be done, and we both get upset when our plans don't go accordingly. Like I said, he's a perfectionist. Unfortunately, I'm an idealist. And we both want to please each other (and other people) at the same time. So at times, we can be at loggerheads and although we trash it out eventually, it gets superheated. I do foresee some dark times ahead...

I dunno. Maybe I should take up that 2-day week offer.